Monday, September 30, 2024

Why I Cut Off All My Hair




There were two motivating factors that finally gave me the courage to do it. The first was a week I spent with a spiritual teacher of mine—a woman in her early 80s who is one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. Her hair is white (not white like “platinum” but white like Mrs. Claus), her skin is parchment and lined, her eyes are brilliant and kind, her hands are covered with age spots. And she is the freest person I have ever met, possessed of the wildest mind. And after a week in her luminous presence, I was like, Why am I still pretending that I’m not getting older? Why am I afraid of looking my age? Why does any of this matter at all? What if I just allowed myself to become a gorgeous old amazing woman, like her? What if I were just free?


The second motivating factor was that I attended an event in New York City a few weeks later of about 100 professionals—men and women, all of whom were about the same age as me. Nearly every one of the men in that room had cropped, buzzed, convenient-looking hair. They were all a bunch of silver foxes with lined faces and handsome features, and they all looked great. And every single one of the women in that room had some version of long, extremely expensive-looking, complicated hair—most of which was “blond.” And I thought, Why are we still doing this? Why has hair become so gendered? This is New York City—one of the most liberal places in the world—and this is a room full of people who all work in the arts! And we still have to follow these stupid rules?

That night I had a realization: I could either complain about how unfair and imbalanced the beauty and aging standards are for men versus women or just claim for myself the entitlement that these men held. I, too, could just decide to have buzzed hair and a lined face. I, too, could decide to just stop chasing “pretty” and instead to look great—unadorned, powerful, comfortable, and un-fussed over.

That did it.

The next day, I bought myself some clippers, watched a few instructional videos (check out a woman known as “Gray Hair and Tattoos” on YouTube if you want to see some really amazing buzzed-hair style) and enlisted a friend who used to be a punk to help me with the first swipes of the buzzer over my scalp.

It took about five minutes, and when I was done, I almost cried. Not because I was horrified by my looks, but for the exact opposite reason: I felt like I had never looked more like myself. I had made this decision because I wanted freedom and convenience, and because I had decided to be “post-vanity,” but what I saw in the mirror looked like beauty to me. Fierce beauty. That was not what I was expecting. I thought I would look tough and weird and old, and I was okay with that. But when I saw myself with no hair, I thought I looked gorgeous, and I still do. I loved being able to see my whole entire head—my whole entire self. I loved the white and brown and gray speckles that catch the light and sparkle like the scales of a swimming trout. And I love the way it felt when I rubbed my hand over my scalp—soft and plush, like a puppy.

“This is the most important thing I’ve ever done in my life,” I said to my friend— and maybe that was hyperbole, or maybe it wasn’t.

It’s been nine months now, and I can’t imagine ever growing my hair out again.

I love everything about it—being able to jump in and out of pools, rivers, lakes, oceans, and showers with abandon; waking up and instantly looking perfect; getting off the plane from a 12-hour flight and looking perfect; needing only five minutes of prep time before I go on stage and perform; constantly rubbing my hands over my delicious-feeling scalp as if I am my own lucky talisman. Most of all, I love the radical independence that this hairstyle affords me. I have spent more days of my life than I care to count sitting in a chair as if I were some incompetent 18th-century aristocrat while others tried to “do something” with my hair. But now I do it all myself. And yes, each time I buzz my hair away, it feels like a cleansing—and like a reclamation of my true spirit. I actually find it weird now to look at pictures of me from when I had hair. The prettier my hair looks in the old pictures, the sadder it makes me feel—to imagine that I gave so much of my time and attention and money to trying to look like something I am not. Something that I am not even sure is attractive—except for the fact that everyone always said it was.


 

A long COVID symptom?

Woman goes completely bald after catching Covid eight times

Sunday, August 25, 2024

It took about 16 years

After about 16 years, this blog reached 800,000 visitors. That doesn't seem like anything to celebrate, but for a niche blog in an era where social media dominate, that's actually better than I had expected. There is not much time for updates, but updates will happen as time permits and this blog seems valuable to at least someone.

If you want to support this blog a little and help me find some time to add new posts, please buy me a coffee. Every contribution helps. Thanks!

Friday, August 23, 2024

WHY I DECIDED TO GO BALD? | MY SCALP ROUTINE | ALOPECIA CCCA | BALDIE | PACIFICA | TREEHUT ❤️👩🏾‍🦲

Showing my true self to the world with alopecia: "I wanted to be free, I feel liberated"


 This articleThis article is about a Philadelphia news anchor who has alopecia and decided to embrace being bald. I like this quote in particular:

It was then I knew I was ready to show my true self to the world. I wanted to be free. And I feel liberated!

My hope is to inspire other people to find the confidence and courage to accept themselves, be fearless, be you! That is where true beauty lies.

And here is a video of a her story on her CBS affiliate station:


Beauty of being bald: Women in Philadelphia speak about balding due to alopecia


 Here is the article. I think the ending is especially worth reading:

"Not coming out was a dark place for me. I felt ugly," Temple said. "We were brought up that hair was everything, so I had to unlearn that hair wasn't everything."

Since shaving off the last of her locs in 2020, Conley-Bacon has reclaimed her crown and discovered a newfound freedom.

"When I look in the mirror, no makeup no anything I was like what the hell was I waiting for!" Conley-Bacon said. "I am free."

Shuler: What does that mean to you?

Conley-Bacon: To be bold, to show up as yourself each and every day.

Bald and Beautiful Pageant Celebrates the Unique Beauty of Bald Women



There is an article that goes with this video. The pageant is in the Dallas metro area on September 28th. Here is more from the article:

The First Annual Bald and Beautiful Pageant aims to celebrate the elegance, confidence, and unique beauty of bare-headed women.

Taking place at the Mesquite Arts Center on September 28, the pageant will include up to 30 bald women, and hopes to instill self-confidence, raise awareness, and help support community engagement.

“As a bald woman myself, I started engaging with the community that also had more beautiful, bald women,” said Kateena Prescott, Pageant Director/President of the She Is Movement. “I had identified that there was not a lot of confidence in that community, so I wanted to be the pillar to be able to…raise awareness and be an advocate.”

September is Alopecia Awareness Month, which is a common medical condition that can cause hair loss, although baldness can be caused by multiple types of diseases, treatments, and conditions.

The pageant contestants will compete in five categories: formal wear, swim wear/beach attire, talent, questionnaire, and the final section, “my prerogative,” which is an opportunity for each contestant to show off their uniqueness. The event will also include entertainment, music, and onsite small business vendors.

“Society looks at them in a different way, being bald and beautiful,” said Okemar Weatherall, Vice President of the She Is Movement. “We want to let them know it’s okay, and we’re here to support them in any way necessary.”

The organization has an Instagram profile, of course, and it is worth supporting.

Thursday, August 22, 2024

Tired of trying to hide hair loss, these women are embracing being bald


This articleThis article features Alicia Flores who founded an annual event called Baldie Con (here is their Instagram profilehere is their Instagram profile). Here is a bit from the article:


Inspired by the community of support she felt in her own life, Flores said she poured her life savings into what she describes as her "passion project," an annual conference known as Baldie Con.

Baldie Con, which was held in September this year in Atlanta, is a two-day gathering for women who have hair loss issues, whether from alopecia or any other condition.

"That's what makes Baldie Con so special, is that we're inclusive," Flores said. "I just want them to be recognized for being special and beautiful and to know that they're loved and know that there's a community out there for them to embrace and to have any kind of information that's out there, whether it's about hair loss, different remedies, treatments."

The next Baldie Con will be late in September. Check their Instagram profile for more information.

Dash Lopez Is Empowering Bald Women To Regain Their Power


As the subtitle says, Dash Lopez discusses her weekly series “Fresh Cut Fridays,” embracing her beauty, and more. Here is a bit of her story:

Hair has a history of being complex for Black women. Society has constantly pressured us on how our hair should be styled to look professional, groomed, and accepted. But being the resilient people we are, we’ve pushed back against these narratives by embracing our hair in whatever way feels best for us. Dash Lopez, for example, is an Afro-Latina content creator, and host of the Gotta Dash podcast, is empowering bald women (71 million viewers, to be exact) in her series, Fresh Cut Fridays. This weekly series reminds others to own their narrative as Lopez gives insight into how she owns hers; shaving her hair each week included. 

Before Fresh Cut Fridays, Dash Lopez was just a girl trying to navigate beauty standards through her hair. “Growing up in a Puerto Rican and Dominican household, I was always praised for having ‘good hair’ by my elders, which didn’t make me feel good,” says Lopez. At the age of 18, Lopez decided to take her identity into her own hands by doing a “big chop,” something that wasn’t widely accepted by her community. “Everyone was pissed when I cut my hair. I wish they didn’t project that onto me.”  

As Lopez entered her 20s, she continued to explore her hair in its new form. She began playing with different colors and styles. Experimentation gave her the confidence to shave her head completely. Judgments and assumptions began to increase from her community and, at times, it became hard to bear. Lopez says, “People have assumed that I have cancer, I’m a lesbian, and have even compared me to Britney Spears.” 

Lopez began to clap back at those who disagreed with her decision by diving into radical acceptance. She started to notice features about herself that weren’t as obvious when she had hair. “I would look in the mirror and notice how much I liked my ears or shoulders. Shaving my head allows me to look at my beauty differently.” This realization gave her the courage to continue rocking the hairstyle despite other people’s opinions. Instagram became a safe space where Lopez could share her struggles with other bald women and encourage them along the way. 

As of late, Lopez has built a community of nearly 90,000 bald women and other supporters. She continues to inspire others by redefining beauty on her terms. “I’ve learned that you can shave your head, and it doesn’t make you less beautiful or of a woman,” she says. With that, and in everything else she does, Lopez serves as an important reminder that the standard of beauty is defined by how we choose to view ourselves. The more we go inward, the closer we are to seeing all of our beauty for what it is.

Usually I don't excerpt this much from an article, but this is an exception. I really recommend her Instagram profile. If you are a bald woman or girl or are thinking of shaving your head, she will offer plenty of advice and support as you redefine beauty on your own terms.

The B@ld Project: Siena



Here is the latest video for The B@ld Project. If you have thought about shaving your head and wondered what it would be like, this series of videos is worth viewing. Hopefully it will encourage you to try it yourself.

Wednesday, August 21, 2024

Annoying Comments You Get After Shaving Your Head

 



This article is nine years old, but it still is as relevant as ever. Although she really enjoyed keeping her head shaved at the time, she found people's reactions at times to be annoying. So she lists off some things that people should never say or do when you see a bald woman or girl. As she says:

I actually had a blast shaving my head (I even made a video of it!) and I've been enjoying the freedom of no hair for the past couple of months. I can't really say that I've been enjoying some of the unsolicited comments that my shaved head provokes, however. I've received some lovely compliments from both friends and strangers alike, but I've also had to field awkward questions and rude comments. Sometimes they're well-intentioned and sometimes not, but either way I'm sure most girls with shaved heads will agree that hearing these nine things over and over again gets pretty tiring.

She then goes through her list. None of the items really surprise me. Don't ask why questions or ask if she is going through chemo. Don't touch her head (without permission). Don't say "you're so brave" or "I could never do that." Really this is common sense stuff. Right? She ends on this note:

So many women have said this to me. It's well-intentioned most of the time (although sometimes there is definitely some shade behind it). The truth is, I'm not brave and you can do it. It's just hair and it grows back. Sure, I was a little nervous to see what it would look like and if I would like it, but I knew even if I hated it, it was temporary.

If you don't want a shaved head, that's fine. You can say that and I won't be insulted. It's not for everyone. If you do want to try it though, then just do it! You'll probably realize that it's a lot of fun. No bravery needed. Well... Maybe a little bravery to put up with some of the silly comments you'll get.


Sunday, August 18, 2024

It's A New Year, Shave Your Head


Although this articlethis article was intended for those who intend to shave their heads as a New Year's rite of passage, the author points out that any time of year you feel ready to shave your head is the right time for you to do it.

 

Emma Corrin Shaves Head for Villainous Role in Deadpool and Wolverine 😲 #EmmaCorrin #shorts

 

Thursday, August 8, 2024

The B@ld Project

Here are four videos by Talia Nat interviewing women who were part of Semester at Sea with her about their experience shaving their heads during Neptune Day (when the ship crosses the equator). The interviews appear to be recent. I don't know if there will be more than these four videos. They're all worth viewing.

Katie:

Alejandra:

 

Natalie:

 


Jasmine: